that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
