Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
