You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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