Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
That reminds me...we need to get swords
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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