i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize
