ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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