there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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