"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
