i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
