1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
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