I'll bet she douches with gravy.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
