I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Randomize
