i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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