Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
May the power of my ass compel you!!
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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