Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
