We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
