Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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