so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
