3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I CAN MOONWALK!
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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