when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
