Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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