were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
