rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Randomize
