I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
These tits shall not be calmed
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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