There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize
