he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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