This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
