I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Who wears a wallet chain?!
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Found your dick twin last night
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
