i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Gay?
German.
Pity.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
