I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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