I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Randomize
