I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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