are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize