This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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