Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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