She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
