someone get that fucking seahorse.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
