nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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