Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
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