This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I showed him my bush... on skype.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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