Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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