i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
