Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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