He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize