He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Randomize
