you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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