fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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