you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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