I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
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