I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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