If i come over, it means nothing
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
